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who am i kidding?

"I've never met a girl who thinks like you." "A lot of people tell me that," she said, digging at a cuticle. "But it's the only way I know how to think. Seriously. I'm just telling you what I believe. It's never crossed my mind that my way of thinking is different from other people's. I'm not trying to be different. But when I speak out honestly, everybody thinks I'm kidding or play-acting. When that happens, I feel like everything's such a pain!" 
Haruki Murakami
Norwegian Wood
 
از عمل پدر بگم که به خوبی صورت گرفت... البته الان سرشون پانسمانه و امیدوارم که مشکلی پیش نیاد...
از اون روز که پدر واسه عمل رفت تا به حال دچار آشفتگی بی اندازه ای شدم... دست و
اومدم دنبال امضاهای فارغ التحصیلیم و از امروز صبح علی الطلوع تا همین الان در کنار فحش های رکیک پیکی بلایندرزی،این جمله هر چندثانیه یکبار توی ذهنم تکرار میشه که are you kidding me?...کارمندها یا کلا نیستن،یا خودشون نیستن و به یکی سپردن که کارشون رو انجام بده و اون جانشین، کار فرد اصلی رو بلد نیست و باید هر ثانیه یکبار تلفن بزنه که این بهترین حالته،و یا خود جانشین محترم هم نیست که این بدترین حالته...از صبح انقدر از این ساختمون و به اون ساختمون،از این بی
 هر روز از نوشتن طفره میرم، به امید اینکه فردا حالم بهتر بشه و مجبور نباشم حال بدم رو هیچ کجا ثبت کنم. اما روز بعدش با آشفتگی بیشتری از خواب بیدار میشم. تصمیم گرفتم نوشتن رو هم امتحان کنم، خدارو چه دیدی، شاید جواب داد.
امروز روز سختی بود. تمام روز رو فقط بدون هیچ کنترلی اشک ریختم. انقدر سخت بود که اون وسطاش داشتم فکر میکردم ممکنه اصلا آخرش رو نبینم... 
و حالا اینجا نشستم و با چشمایی که میسوزن و ورم کردن، دارم حال این روز بد رو ثبت می‌کنم.
من دوستش
پیش نوشت1: مدت زیادی بود که چندتا ویدیوی TED توی قسمت saved message ِ تلگرامم داشتن خاک می‌خوردن! بالاخره زمانی از این قرنطینه رو برای دیدن اونا استفاده کردم و شد آنچه شد...
                 یکیش انقدر خوب بود که توی اینستام پیشنهاد کردم ملت ببینن... جسارت نمی‌کنم که خلاصه‌ش کنم!! (توی پی‌نوشت اسمش رو می‌گذارم..)
                    دوتای دیگه رو اینجا میخوام خلاصه‌ای ازشون بذارم تا بماند برای آیندگان :))
پیش نوشت 2: اگه غلط تایپی یا املایی دیدین لطفا بهم خ
خانه از پای بند ویران است
خواجه در بند نقش ایوان است
 
ماجراهای جالبی در کشورمان در حال وقوع است ! شلوغی ها و اولویت های مختلفی داریم که این ریزدانه ها خیلی به حساب نمی آیند. ولی تجسم کنید ! و بدانید :
فردی از تمام ظرفیت خود و خانواده ی خاص خود استفاده کرده است تا پای غربی ها (به خصوص فرانسه) به حوزه فرهنگ ایران باز شود (به بهانه های مختلف که اکثرا تا کنون پوچ بوده است) و اکنون همان فرد در حال تکاپو برای دریافت اقامت دوم از یک کشور غربی برای زندگی
Such a birthday party is much more enjoyable
If you are going to a birthday party, be smart and fun at the ceremony, sing, and help the ceremony be held as best as possible.
What to do at a birthday party so much fun
To celebrate birthday as much as possible and create a happy and enjoyable atmosphere at birth, guests and hosts should take care to keep the celebration well and happy. In this part of the Damp , we teach you ways to use it to have a happy and beautiful celebration to make everyone happy. 
When and when to celebrate a birthday?
The best time to have a birthday party on Wednesdays or Thursdays is when the children are closed the next day and do not go to school. It's not good to have a birthday party on Friday night, because it may be too late and the children start fatigue o
OK, so let’s talk about the first months of being in a Starbucks kind of dream :)
So, before anything else I’d just like to mention that like everybody elses, I might have kind of mistakes -maybe even the stupid ones in my posts. I do have them even when I use to write in the blog in my mother language, I mean the Persian, and I really like to remind that I’m not that much perfect at English so if you ever feel uncomfortable about something wrong in my grammar, or vocabulary or just any kind of mistake, please feel free to easily -and of course kindly :) – make me aware of them, so I can improve myself as well as writing greater posts in the future.
So, where was I? Oh, yeah, about that kind of Starbucks dream, wasn’t I? Yes. You know around six or maybe seven months ago -I don
OK, so let’s talk about the first months of being in a Starbucks kind of dream :)
So, before anything else I’d just like to mention that like everybody elses, I might have kind of mistakes -maybe even the stupid ones in my posts. I do have them even when I use to write in the blog in my mother language, I mean the Persian, and I really like to remind that I’m not that much perfect at English so if you ever feel uncomfortable about something wrong in my grammar, or vocabulary or just any kind of mistake, please feel free to easily -and of course kindly :) – make me aware of them, so I can improve myself as well as writing greater posts in the future.
So, where was I? Oh, yeah, about that kind of Starbucks dream, wasn’t I? Yes. You know around six or maybe seven months ago -I don
OK, so let’s talk about the first months of being in a Starbucks kind of dream :)
So, before anything else I’d just like to mention that like everybody elses, I might have kind of mistakes -maybe even the stupid ones in my posts. I do have them even when I use to write in the blog in my mother language, I mean the Persian, and I really like to remind that I’m not that much perfect at English so if you ever feel uncomfortable about something wrong in my grammar, or vocabulary or just any kind of mistake, please feel free to easily -and of course kindly :) – make me aware of them, so I can improve myself as well as writing greater posts in the future.
So, where was I? Oh, yeah, about that kind of Starbucks dream, wasn’t I? Yes. You know around six or maybe seven months ago -I don
OK, so let’s talk about the first months of being in a Starbucks kind of dream :)
So, before anything else I’d just like to mention that like everybody elses, I might have kind of mistakes -maybe even the stupid ones in my posts. I do have them even when I use to write in the blog in my mother language, I mean the Persian, and I really like to remind that I’m not that much perfect at English so if you ever feel uncomfortable about something wrong in my grammar, or vocabulary or just any kind of mistake, please feel free to easily -and of course kindly :) – make me aware of them, so I can improve myself as well as writing greater posts in the future.
So, where was I? Oh, yeah, about that kind of Starbucks dream, wasn’t I? Yes. You know around six or maybe seven months ago -I don
OK, so let’s talk about the first months of being in a Starbucks kind of dream :)
So, before anything else I’d just like to mention that like everybody elses, I might have kind of mistakes -maybe even the stupid ones in my posts. I do have them even when I use to write in the blog in my mother language, I mean the Persian, and I really like to remind that I’m not that much perfect at English so if you ever feel uncomfortable about something wrong in my grammar, or vocabulary or just any kind of mistake, please feel free to easily -and of course kindly :) – make me aware of them, so I can improve myself as well as writing greater posts in the future.
So, where was I? Oh, yeah, about that kind of Starbucks dream, wasn’t I? Yes. You know around six or maybe seven months ago -I don
OK, so let’s talk about the first months of being in a Starbucks kind of dream :)
So, before anything else I’d just like to mention that like everybody elses, I might have kind of mistakes -maybe even the stupid ones in my posts. I do have them even when I use to write in the blog in my mother language, I mean the Persian, and I really like to remind that I’m not that much perfect at English so if you ever feel uncomfortable about something wrong in my grammar, or vocabulary or just any kind of mistake, please feel free to easily -and of course kindly :) – make me aware of them, so I can improve myself as well as writing greater posts in the future.
So, where was I? Oh, yeah, about that kind of Starbucks dream, wasn’t I? Yes. You know around six or maybe seven months ago -I don

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